... precious gifts ...

The most precious gift we can give to others is our time, and to be fully present while giving. However, the most precious gift we can give is to give our time to ourselves. Time to grieve, time to heal, time for now being well, or time to just kick back and relax in a hot steaming bath.

This is my promise to myself tonight. After three consecutive flatlay photoshoots over the last four days, my back is feeling it. They were all very busy, full day shoots, and the mountain of unedited images can simply wait.

When we are extremely busy, it may seem the most counter intuitive thing to do - to give ourselves time. From life's hard lessons, I am finally beginning to learn that this is the most important time to step of the hamster wheel and simply soak up some time.

The only thing I am not sure about is whether to add one or two cups of muscle soak to the water!

I hope you also find some time today to take some time for now being well.

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Flying Solo Tip 019365 : All super flying dragons know, that the most precious gift you can give is giving yourself the gift of time for yourself.

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... i'm in love ...

You know that captivating feeling when you can find beauty in whatever is around you, when the world seems more vibrant and peaceful. That feeling where you are paying attention to the finer details in life, yet feel as though you can see further, and broader than before. The feeling that wherever you turn it feels as though this moment has been especially designed just for you.

Today I found such a moment to just fall in love. It was a good half day shoot in the studio, photographing scarves for a number of designers. When I pulled this scarf out to photograph I was simply captivated. It is the gorgeous work of a local and talented designer Varina Krook @stashtextiles. Varina's work is so delicate and refined, subtle and intricate. It made me realise how easy it is for my energy to be revitalised when I am surrounded by creativity.

I am discovering that life seems to have a less frenetic pace when I simply find little moments throughout the day for simply being in love, being in inspiration, being in creativity, being in sadness, being in confusion, being in wellness or whatever it may be and letting those moments of being flow through to the next. Today I think I started to appreciate the difference between responding and holding onto an emotion or state of consciousness (reacting emotionally) versus allowing and letting go. It has just occurred to me that if we allow our emotions to flow as naturally as our breathe .... inhale - pause -exhale ... then it might be possible that life would become less of a struggle. Feel the emotion - appreciate the emotion - let go of the emotion.

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Flying Solo Tip 018365 : To fly the long haul, allow your emotions to flow as naturally and effortlessly as your breath.

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... tell me a story ...

Sharing stories is an intrinsic element of the human condition. Telling each other deeply personal and meaningful stories helps us build connections, make sense of the world, and if told well we can glean wisdom and inspiration from the words. The symbolism of myths and legends can help us tap deep into our psyches and instinctual natures. In the last 24 hours I had the honour of two such separate and long conversations steeped in story telling and rich with insight.

With the increasing inclusion of social media into our daily communications, our adeptness at storytelling and consumption of stories has changed significantly. Sharing personal stories has become a superficial affair, with little meaning or satisfaction in the sharing. By the time we post, what we have written is already old news. In many respects we have become two dimensional characters projecting only a sliver of ourselves to the world. Our story telling has evolved yet our archetypical nature still yearns for meaningful connection. We become increasingly disgruntled and disconnected.

Through social media we have all become our own publicist and advertising agency. Our social media feeds are deeply protected and skewed hollow representations of ourselves. Because meaningful engagement in a modern world has been reduced to an emoticon or brief comment, we are rarely requested to expand on our story or challenged to verify its authenticity or engaged in a meaningful questioning dialogue to find the treasures that exist within our daily experiences.

Before committing to this blog, I did considerable inner work to understand the real motivation for me wanting to do so.

In the past I have completed two other 365 day projects - both were photography based. The first one was a deeply coded personal journey, a safe way for me to find my voice and expression after years of living a dysfunctional workaholic lifestyle, becoming disconnected from my own sense of identity and capacity to engage in personal relationships outside of a work context. The character of that story, a tiny blue robot took on a life of his own. Through the character of Tiny, I was able to re-engage the playfulness of my personality, explore the world with fresh eyes and naivety and cement friendships some of which are still valid today. In many ways, Tiny gave me the courage to take leaps of faith into the unknown, an outlet to express those experiences and simultaneously protect my real life identity.

By the time the Tiny project was complete, my world had completely changed - I was in a new relationship and both my then to-be-husband and I paraded our relationship for social media consumption with a largely shared contact base. My next 365 came shortly after, filling the pages of a red covered diary with photographs and quotes. Strangely I felt more restricted in the "Little Red Book" project. I had unconsciously fallen into the trap of creating a public persona and posting to that persona rather than being true to my soul. I can still recall some of the flippant or more obscure entries conceived specifically to cover up elements of the real life story that were emerging in my life. The project became a juggling act of matching my inner experience to a public perception and for the most part was not satisfying.

If we engage with social media as a channel to find expression for our deeply personal lives, we do leave ourselves open to being hurt, rejected, or misunderstood and can bring to into our life unnecessary conflict and distraction from investing in more immediate and tangible relationships. Although social media can lead us to wonderful long lasting friendships and even love relationships, many of us post or comment from our own egocentric point of view with little regard for the other real people associated with the stories we are digesting. When the online relationships are tenuous there is little recourse to bring balance or a fuller perspective without creating drama or engaging in post feed rage.

Over a 6 month period, I watched myself portrayed as a character in another's social media stories and my posts used as a platform to reinforce that story. The few times I intervened caused more personal harm than good and my voice was silenced. As in any good drama, my character was swiftly dismissed as soon as it no longer added value to the story line. The exiting of my character from that person's social media stories was crucial to both of our offline lives and for us to each move forward. The act was inevitable and necessary.

Within this context it may seem odd then that I am doing this project. It is reasonable to assume that my motivations are questionable. Some time before I started this project, I did speak directly to those significant others who may be inadvertently affected by the words I write. I do not intend to retaliate, harm or direct blame through my posts. I may draw on my personal history and stories of my past to bring light to my thoughts and experiences that I have on the day of the post. Naturally those stories are coloured by the filters of my own perceptions and projections and in no way do I ever mean for them to convey an absolute truth, but merely my personal interpretation of events. If any of my readers who share a contact with the people mentioned in my stories then please do not ignore them, they are real people with feelings and a different point of view. If you are concerned with or curious about what I write, contact them and ask for their perspective, or contact me for further clarification. Some content I choose to write about may be confronting or incongruent with your perspective.

From an egotistical point of view, I am committed to this project to enrich my own personal journey, to appreciate and to honour what has come to pass in my life in the recent as well as more distant past and to develop my sense of gratitude for my life today. I hope that by exploring my inner world publicly, I will be able to clarify my life's intentions, desires and conceive a way to live now, being well. By sharing my words I am holding myself into account for the values and principles I wish to live my life by. My perspective will not always be consistent. When you fly solo, it is good to have guideposts along the way, but also to have a record of what has passed so you can see how far you have come. The shape and reach of the shadows cast by our stories depends on how we fly. I realise that most of what I have written to date is very introspective and philosophical. Perhaps overtime, the entries will become more lighthearted as the context of my life changes and that sense of now being well is a steady and strong constant in my day to days. When I write, it quietens my mind and brings clarity to my senses. Before each post, I do a meditation to clear the charges from my thoughts and release the energy from my emotions so I can allow myself as best as I can to listen to that deep inner voice of wisdom which resides in each of us.

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Flying solo tip 017365 : When you fly solo, it is good to have guideposts along the way, but also to have a record of what has passed so you can see how far you have come.

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